Wake up to sleep marketing!
The average Briton spends 36% of their time sleeping. And yet dinosaur agencies still spend less than 1% of their budgets on interrupting people while they snooze. This is the most eye-opening finding of a new independent survey, carried out by completely objective experts at the Sleep Marketing Foundation. Using ratecards from other media, they extrapolate that British marketers need to spend £10 billion on sleep marketing techniques, just to match consumers’ undoubted appetite for this kind of advertising. By 2020, the figure could be as high as £20 billion. Or possibly even £50 billion. Definitely a big round number, anyway.
A spokesperson from leading sleep marketing specialist Kip commented: ‘These findings show that traditional agencies just don’t get it. Sleep is a medium with 100% penetration, daily usage, an 8 hour dwell time on average and very strong satisfaction levels. We have invested in sophisticated eye-tracking studies which prove that the habit is now endemic, especially among the young. We have also used highly complex neurological devices to show that people love their sleep so much that they experience physical withdrawal symptoms if they are deprived of it for any length of time. The only logical conclusion is that brands must piggyback these positive associations and interrupt every possible minute of the sleep cycle with advertising messages.’
Meanwhile, a planner who has read 10 reports in the last week, that were analogous to this, battered his head off his desk, before falling into a deep (and hopefully unbroken) sleep. Zzzzzzz.